Thursday, May 13, 2010

Human Design?

"Do you know your birth time!!!!?" The words flew out of his mouth with desperation and excitement.

"2:20, I think, I dunno, why?" The preceding question had left me equally flummoxed. Did I know about Human Design? It was early and the sleep was still heavy in my eyes. I'd stumbled the few hundred feet from the house where I was staying to the Mea House to talk to Cyan about arranging to get a full moon ceremony tonight at his place. It was about a half hour drive out of town on what I had been told was incredibly beautiful land. Add aya and moonlight, it sounded like magic.

Approaching the house, the first thing I noticed was a tangle of kittens swarming around the doorstep - a portent for what lay inside. I think at last count something like two guys and seven girls were living in this modest sized house in what seemed like a state of childlike delight. The sun broke over the distant hills with pinkish tinge, beautifully backlighting the house and outlying structures: a teepee, a few tents, and some unspecified wooden creation that seemed to imply 'porch'. Bright eyed creatures were stirring, meditating, yogaing and making espresso. Holistic kittens greeting the new day. Burning Man with plumbing.

Before I had even made my way inside, my interrogator, Chatty, had descended upon me. Gesturing excitedly, he led me to an unused corner of the porch, where he extracted the worlds tinniest computer from a bag and started typing. I was trying to figure out what the "Human Design" thing was . The night before, I'd heard Robin Hood, a good natured English chap - who, incidentally, could be seen at this moment doing sun salutations wearing, quite unashamedly, a mauve loin cloth - gush excitedly about geodesic construction, so I was figuring it was some feng shui ergonomic alignment of the stars and the light switch kinda thing. Or some new energy healing modality. Six Chakras instead of seven, or is five. I didn't really care. My semi-concious self was focusing it's limited mentally capacities on talking to Cyan - logistical co ordination in this world in which I did not have a phone, internet or any form of transportation really seemed more of a priority then the latest refinements of hippiedom.

By now the computer was purring away. Chatty requested my birth city, and was punching away into a very pretty looking computer program and suddenly looked like he was about to explode, like a little girl who'd had to many sweets. 'You're a Reflector, just like me." With a little effort I managed to focus on what he was saying. Apparently Human Design has nothing to do with light switches. It's this neo-astrology, that combines Chinese astrology ( thats the one with year of the Pig, etc) with western astrology and some German engineering to make this very exact understanding of the human condition.

Apparently 'Reflectors' are pretty rare. 1.5 percent of the population or so. I didn't get the full deal, but they aren't really supposed to work, they're supposed to cruise around, briefly sample this that and the other thing, all of which they have a remarkable ability to groc based on a just a small taste of and move on. And they reflect. So it's important to their well being that they're surrounded by good people and good environments. And somehow this reflecting was also a good for the people around me. Sounded great to me.

But lets just run the bullshit detector. There wasn't any real way to check the validity of thing itself, but it seemed worthwhile to look into the associated elements. Lets start with astrology - I've always had a problem with it. I've yet to have anyone give me any decent explanation of how it could possibly work. Faith in anything without a mechanism that explains it seems kinda fishy to me. Also, I've always associated it with people kind of weakly fishing about for some meaning to their life and guys who will pretend to be interested in anything to get laid. That said, I've really never looked into it much, and I suppose the position of the planets could influence you, but it would seem to me the time you are in would be a lot more important than the time you were born. On the other hand am stubborn and grounded, which I understand to be the two hallmarks of a Taurus. Chinese astrology I feel a little better about - first of all I associate it with much more together people. Taoism and Traditional Chinese Medicine have all sorts of things that work great without me understanding how, so I have a little more faith in the Chinese. Both very scientific ways of coming to a conclusion I realize. Also, everything in the descriptions do seem to match the people. But how could everyone born in whole year have similar traits. On the upside, I'm a tiger. How cool is that?

So basically I'm far from sold, but you might be able to talk me into it.

Now Chatty. Well, he was just that. Chatty. And I don't want to say he seemed dishonest, but he did have a harmless but none to successful hustler quality about him. The way he'd descended on me was definitely on the goofy end of predatory. I'd heard him after the last ceremony laying some cheesy game down on this girl about how sad he was that he was leaving this beautiful paradise. And you could just hear the subtext, that it the only possible solace for this tragedy was for her to give herself to him. It was just classic new agey passive pick up line. I hate that shit. I mean dude, if you think she's fine and you want to get with her, just say so. And here's the kicker, he said he was going to Dubai, to DJ. Sounds pretty glam right? But no, it was terrible, it was babylon, [eyes batting sensitively] he loved nature, he needed sympathy (and possibly a blow job) I almost kicked him in the balls right then and there.

So this was the guy telling me we both had this rare thing in common and we weren't supposed to work. Color me skeptical. I spotted Cyan - the only reason I was bothering with the human race before going for a run - out of the corner of my eye. " And where did this system come from?"

"I channeled it in Ibiza in 1987"

"Cool." I said and walked over to Cyan, impressed that such a spacey seeming dude had written any sort of computer program ad pretty sure I'd heard as much as I needed to about Human Design.

Cyan smiled, post yoga. It was a beautiful morning. Better, he was going to pick me in a few hours, which gave me just enough time to do some chi gung before heading off on the adventure.


  1. Question: how can you know exact time for pre-natal calculation (Design, in red color) ?? Some of us born relatively prematurely, others - cesarean section, etc. I don't think it is anyhow possible to find out exact time of pre-natal, or our unconscious definition formation. Any opinions?

  2. Hello there! Just want to say that Chinese astrology is bullshit - maybe they're not well known to foreigners but you can check out "four pillars destiny" "purple star astrology" on Wikipedia, these are some very common astrology Chinese use for centuries, and there are even more types of it, hundreds of variations I'm afraid. Taoism is in fact philosophical and Chinese medicine is in fact scientifically built up and it can be tested so it's so where near astrology. Telling from history, Chinese is one of the most superstitious race in the world and we have been fighting really hard trying to get rid of it(lots of people nowadays treat it as some valuable sources of reference or even authorities to follow) it's interesting to know that it didn't get to the hears of people outside our culture.